Tuesday, November 4, 2008
It is raining in the city of Pompei
There are many nights inside a rainy day. I woke up into one of them with the remains of an unfinished dream pooled in the grooves of my rugged consciousness. Sounds rained first and the translucent liquid flowing along with it was forgotten at once. All the other senses were silenced by this ruthless attack and within no time all the lesser sounds other that the sounds of rain were callously swallowed. Everything around was getting mutated. I felt like lying alone in a vertical chamber dug in the middle of a roaring stadium and was slowly been pulled up just to get slaughtered by bloodthirsty gladiators. I cupped and opened my ears continuously and could hear the flapping sounds of two enormous wings. I tried to open my eyes and ‘see’ things. But my eyes couldn’t remember how it was seeing things before. The calendar on the wall with red-circled working days, red holidays and black normal days, the ringed transparent well made out of the bottom of a plastic bottle which I used as a pencil stand , my rusty table fan with dark green leaves and the silver snout always ready to get replaced as the propellor of any fighter craft, the pink waste basket surrounded by crumbled peices of paper in the right corner of the room reminding me of lost trajectories and failed ‘baskets’...Everything eyes could see was instantaneously killed by the brutal invasion of this avalanche of sounds and my room remained there like the city of Pompei .I opened the windows and saw hundreds of enormous silver legged stilt walkers running across the garden towards me.....
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79 comments:
Reminds me of a nightmare i had on diwali day while i was napping after a fight with M
Awesome description of everything in the room. feels like i was thr muself.
Very very vey well written indeed :)
extremely well written...as usual MIP :) reeli nice!
scary!! nicely put!!
;-))
Surreal and evocative! A lot synesthesia at work too! I like the way you make the overwhelming sound contrast with the muting ones as well!
Actually, this brings an instant vision to the mind, as it's so well, and graphically captured in words!
Well portrayed. Your writing skill continues to amuse me :)
You have managed to take the reader along with you inside what's happening like he's there to witness it.
Good work.
sensed reality...
yet the magic of poetic rhetoric revels!
good one MIP! :-)
wishes!
devika
MIP
This is very different and quite abstract, combining thoughts, dreams, realities and happenings of the mind!
However, what this post does most is to bring about a sense of difference (as in picture the unknown)
Quite a read! Good, as always!
I''ll call this one "Mind in Painting" ;)
Cheers
Rakesh
the description made me visualize each and every object..
marvelous and yeah the title reminded me of Shakespeare..
:)
How different from my interpretations of the rain :(. . .Lovely post,as always , I really could envision the rained-in room
God MIP..i will say this again, i really want to get into that brain of yours and see how your gray cells work. you know what? i lost you a little on those stilt walkers...pompeii was buried under a volcano, so the avalanche was fine, but what are those stilt walkers? lightning??
"There are many nights inside a rainy day. " Wonderful opening line.
Well written piece. It grips the reader.
u sure its not a night mare?? hnnmm was spookyy reallyy
btw does this have a continuation.. coz i feel u could continue this .. :)
came upon ur blog thru a meandering chain of links. quite liked it. took the liberty of adding u 2 my bloglist!
hmm this is interesting. I am not sure what to make of it though... :-)
"...remains of an unfinished dream." How wild it is you read right into my life, my friend. Ok well first things first - forgive my "running away." It was one of the best things I ever did though and I'm literally... replenished. (yes i'm sure that's the right word.) How are you wonderful friend?? Bravo on this life-giving piece...
You really took me to the city of Pompei and to your room- and it was still raining. Good job.
@mampi
it is just raining...it is a portion from a story i had written..
happy you liked it..
@heart and soul
thank you
@sashu..
thank u..
missing your poems..will visit today
MIP
@satish..
Scary?
was it?:)
mip
@ushaji..
happy you liked it..
thank you..
mip
@vubhushan..
happy you liked the post...
mip
@devika
thank you..
take care
wishes
mip
@rakesh..
thank you
mip
@shruthi..
very very happy you liked it..
@fantasies..
rain is always a magician..it takes our mind and make it into whatever thing it wants...
thanks..
mip
@roopa..
about stilt walkers..
shall i tell you ..or will you wait till the next rain running towards you with..slender silver legs running across my garden..
but i liked your contributuin..
lightning..
wonderful
this is the start of a short story i had written..
mip
@musings..
thank you..
mip
@ani
yes it has a continuation..it is the part of a story i had written..
very very happy you liked it..
take care
mip
@reema
thank uou reema..
very happy you like it..
@raaji
lol
now it is just raining..
it is the starting of a stort i wrote..
with some editing..like the pompei thing...
mip
jo...
welcome back...
I am fine and happy as usual...
take care
mip
@old monk
thanks a lot monk
happy you liked it...
mip
just the kind of writing I absolutely adore... need i say anything more :)
Very graphic post!
Keshi.
@swayam
very happy you liked it...
mip
@keshi
thank you..
Hmm...I loved the effect you gave it! , and it ws so realistic too...very sequentially put...
:)
its so methodical that it replicates my percetions!
MIP,
If only Steven Spielberg would see this, he would have made this into a film - 'The Invasion'.
Cheers,
Salil
PS : There are many nights inside a rainy day - Oh no! (still scratching my head)
Its still raining there, in your magical city of Pompei?
in my Delhi winters is on --:-)
came looking for new one MIP!
On a break, perhaps i have enoug time in hand..anyway..hope to see one soon
wishes!
devika
MIP
You have been tagged!
http://almostsunday.blogspot.com/2008/11/tagged-in-silver.html
Cheers
Rakesh
I will wait till the next rain MIP :)...by the way, I am blogrolling you. I don't know how I missed doing that before!!
God ! That was smth !!!!!
A very detailed description, wonder how much attention you mst have put to the evey lil corner !!!!
sometimes the noises in my head are sooo lud i just sunno how to quieten them,,
amazing metaphors n descriptions,.. loved 'the silver snout always ready to get replaced as the propellor of any fighter craft'
:)
ya always take me on a ride!
however dark n dingy they may be :)
nice read.. you do possess an attuned ear for the nuances of language and the way you attach feelings and probe delicate layers of conciousness .. is amazing..
@ayushi..
thank you..
@salil
lol
thank you ...
@devika
yes..it is just raining..
take care
@rakesh..
some tags are pending..ani..mampi...
i will do it..
@roopa
thank you.
@cindrella..
very very happy you liked it..it is the opening of something i have written..
@jane.
thank you...
take care
I think i understand MIP...
but praying the rain stop fast...its getting very melancholic ...as the dark falls..
Wishes!
devika
@aria
When soembody like you say that i feel honoured..
where are u?
but I never miss a visit to terminal moraine..even if you have forgotten it..
take care
come back
Extremely descriptive and enrapturing... As always :)
Cheers,
Ashen
oh ..surreaistic truly
um plz remove d word verification
@ashen
thank you very much..
@think tank..
it was an attempt..
thank you..
"The calendar on the wall with red-circled working days, red holidays and black normal days,"
smart as always!
MIP,
sorry im late, but the write up was great as usual. I loved your descriptions, but I have to say for a simpleton like me, I would like easier words to read interspersed with the vivid description. For eg
"I felt like lying alone in a vertical chamber dug in the middle of a roaring stadium and was slowly been pulled up just to get slaughtered by bloodthirsty gladiators", is a amazing description, but maybe a lil more words insterspersed with those descriptions.. keep writing, waiting to read more
@debu
thank you...
@anu
thats true..me too like small sentences..i will definitely keep that point in my mind when i attempt another one..
thanks a lot..
take care
mip
I love the pools in the grooves
wow...thats deep...!! tht u had a bad dream or somethin!! :)
vinay.
ps: come help me celebrate my 100th post na..!! :) rhymes blog...
@echo
thank you..
@vinay..
just watching the rain..
i will come and join the celebration..
Hi MIP,
seemingly it isn't going to 'really' rain anywhere..but some celebrations in the offing -- rain dance??
i wouldn't join, but will love watching..as you, i love the business of watching ;-))
btw, its been long you posted one. you too on a break like me...
come up with a new one, MIP..
the real MIP magic at work!!
wishes,
devika
drowning in the city of pompei... maybe someone will rediscover you from your watery shrine perfectly preserved one day...
Back after space gazing...
It's raining back here in Johore, Malaysia almost everyday.
Thank you for your kind visit.
I will come again.
Bye.
it doesn't matter much..but it is important if only I see rain with fresh eyes again and again..
thank you tuna for coming back..
@venus
thank you..everyday rain..:)that is something..
wishes..
MIP
loved some of ur imagery... "many nights inside a rainy day", "the pink waste basket surrounded by crumbled peices of paper in the right corner of the room reminding me of lost trajectories and failed ‘baskets’", "saw hundreds of enormous silver legged stilt walkers running across the garden towards me.." ...
keep it up... lookin forward to more creations!! and thanks for viitin my blog too....:). oh... and ya... this is anon..i remain.. i have changed my name...
@mind...
thanks a lot...you have a very nice blog..
take care
wishes..
mip
this was brillaint...blogrollin ya
looks like I AM LEGEND movie:)...nice one!
@mayz
thank you..
@Broca's area.
:)
thank you..
:-)))
if you knew mlayalam, i would have told the right word..:-)
why did you hold all these days, MAN?? :)))
how's baby B? and baby sitting going?
wishes!
devika
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