Tuesday, November 4, 2008

It is raining in the city of Pompei

There are many nights inside a rainy day. I woke up into one of them with the remains of an unfinished dream pooled in the grooves of my rugged consciousness. Sounds rained first and the translucent liquid flowing along with it was forgotten at once. All the other senses were silenced by this ruthless attack and within no time all the lesser sounds other that the sounds of rain were callously swallowed. Everything around was getting mutated. I felt like lying alone in a vertical chamber dug in the middle of a roaring stadium and was slowly been pulled up just to get slaughtered by bloodthirsty gladiators. I cupped and opened my ears continuously and could hear the flapping sounds of two enormous wings. I tried to open my eyes and ‘see’ things. But my eyes couldn’t remember how it was seeing things before. The calendar on the wall with red-circled working days, red holidays and black normal days, the ringed transparent well made out of the bottom of a plastic bottle which I used as a pencil stand , my rusty table fan with dark green leaves and the silver snout always ready to get replaced as the propellor of any fighter craft, the pink waste basket surrounded by crumbled peices of paper in the right corner of the room reminding me of lost trajectories and failed ‘baskets’...Everything eyes could see was instantaneously killed by the brutal invasion of this avalanche of sounds and my room remained there like the city of Pompei .I opened the windows and saw hundreds of enormous silver legged stilt walkers running across the garden towards me.....

79 comments:

Mampi said...

Reminds me of a nightmare i had on diwali day while i was napping after a fight with M

Heart'n'Soul said...

Awesome description of everything in the room. feels like i was thr muself.

Very very vey well written indeed :)

Sashu... said...

extremely well written...as usual MIP :) reeli nice!

deepsat said...

scary!! nicely put!!

;-))

Usha Pisharody said...

Surreal and evocative! A lot synesthesia at work too! I like the way you make the overwhelming sound contrast with the muting ones as well!

Actually, this brings an instant vision to the mind, as it's so well, and graphically captured in words!

Vibushan Lakshminarayan said...

Well portrayed. Your writing skill continues to amuse me :)
You have managed to take the reader along with you inside what's happening like he's there to witness it.
Good work.

Devika said...

sensed reality...
yet the magic of poetic rhetoric revels!

good one MIP! :-)

wishes!
devika

Rakesh Vanamali said...

MIP

This is very different and quite abstract, combining thoughts, dreams, realities and happenings of the mind!

However, what this post does most is to bring about a sense of difference (as in picture the unknown)

Quite a read! Good, as always!

I''ll call this one "Mind in Painting" ;)

Cheers

Rakesh

Shruti said...

the description made me visualize each and every object..
marvelous and yeah the title reminded me of Shakespeare..
:)

Fantasies of a Lifetime said...

How different from my interpretations of the rain :(. . .Lovely post,as always , I really could envision the rained-in room

Roopa said...

God MIP..i will say this again, i really want to get into that brain of yours and see how your gray cells work. you know what? i lost you a little on those stilt walkers...pompeii was buried under a volcano, so the avalanche was fine, but what are those stilt walkers? lightning??

Musings of a wanderer said...

"There are many nights inside a rainy day. " Wonderful opening line.

Well written piece. It grips the reader.

Ani said...

u sure its not a night mare?? hnnmm was spookyy reallyy

btw does this have a continuation.. coz i feel u could continue this .. :)

reema said...

came upon ur blog thru a meandering chain of links. quite liked it. took the liberty of adding u 2 my bloglist!

(¯`•._.•[Raaji]•._.•´¯) said...

hmm this is interesting. I am not sure what to make of it though... :-)

Jo said...

"...remains of an unfinished dream." How wild it is you read right into my life, my friend. Ok well first things first - forgive my "running away." It was one of the best things I ever did though and I'm literally... replenished. (yes i'm sure that's the right word.) How are you wonderful friend?? Bravo on this life-giving piece...

Old Monk said...

You really took me to the city of Pompei and to your room- and it was still raining. Good job.

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@mampi
it is just raining...it is a portion from a story i had written..
happy you liked it..

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@heart and soul
thank you

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@sashu..
thank u..
missing your poems..will visit today
MIP

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@satish..
Scary?
was it?:)
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@ushaji..
happy you liked it..
thank you..
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@vubhushan..
happy you liked the post...
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@devika
thank you..
take care
wishes
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@rakesh..
thank you
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@shruthi..
very very happy you liked it..

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@fantasies..
rain is always a magician..it takes our mind and make it into whatever thing it wants...
thanks..
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@roopa..
about stilt walkers..
shall i tell you ..or will you wait till the next rain running towards you with..slender silver legs running across my garden..
but i liked your contributuin..
lightning..
wonderful
this is the start of a short story i had written..
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@musings..
thank you..
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@ani
yes it has a continuation..it is the part of a story i had written..
very very happy you liked it..
take care
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@reema
thank uou reema..
very happy you like it..

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@raaji
lol
now it is just raining..
it is the starting of a stort i wrote..
with some editing..like the pompei thing...
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

jo...
welcome back...
I am fine and happy as usual...
take care
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@old monk
thanks a lot monk
happy you liked it...
mip

Swayam said...

just the kind of writing I absolutely adore... need i say anything more :)

Keshi said...

Very graphic post!

Keshi.

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@swayam
very happy you liked it...
mip

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@keshi
thank you..

Ayushi said...

Hmm...I loved the effect you gave it! , and it ws so realistic too...very sequentially put...
:)
its so methodical that it replicates my percetions!

Sal said...

MIP,
If only Steven Spielberg would see this, he would have made this into a film - 'The Invasion'.
Cheers,
Salil
PS : There are many nights inside a rainy day - Oh no! (still scratching my head)

Devika said...

Its still raining there, in your magical city of Pompei?

in my Delhi winters is on --:-)

came looking for new one MIP!

On a break, perhaps i have enoug time in hand..anyway..hope to see one soon

wishes!
devika

Rakesh Vanamali said...

MIP

You have been tagged!

http://almostsunday.blogspot.com/2008/11/tagged-in-silver.html

Cheers

Rakesh

Roopa said...

I will wait till the next rain MIP :)...by the way, I am blogrolling you. I don't know how I missed doing that before!!

Cinderella. said...

God ! That was smth !!!!!

A very detailed description, wonder how much attention you mst have put to the evey lil corner !!!!

rantravereflect/ jane said...

sometimes the noises in my head are sooo lud i just sunno how to quieten them,,

amazing metaphors n descriptions,.. loved 'the silver snout always ready to get replaced as the propellor of any fighter craft'

:)

ya always take me on a ride!
however dark n dingy they may be :)

aria said...

nice read.. you do possess an attuned ear for the nuances of language and the way you attach feelings and probe delicate layers of conciousness .. is amazing..

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@ayushi..
thank you..

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@salil
lol
thank you ...

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@devika
yes..it is just raining..
take care

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@rakesh..
some tags are pending..ani..mampi...
i will do it..

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@roopa
thank you.

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@cindrella..
very very happy you liked it..it is the opening of something i have written..

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@jane.
thank you...
take care

Devika said...

I think i understand MIP...

but praying the rain stop fast...its getting very melancholic ...as the dark falls..

Wishes!
devika

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@aria
When soembody like you say that i feel honoured..
where are u?
but I never miss a visit to terminal moraine..even if you have forgotten it..
take care
come back

AshenGlow said...

Extremely descriptive and enrapturing... As always :)

Cheers,
Ashen

Think Tank said...

oh ..surreaistic truly

Think Tank said...

um plz remove d word verification

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@ashen
thank you very much..
@think tank..
it was an attempt..
thank you..

debasish.. said...

"The calendar on the wall with red-circled working days, red holidays and black normal days,"

smart as always!

Anu said...

MIP,
sorry im late, but the write up was great as usual. I loved your descriptions, but I have to say for a simpleton like me, I would like easier words to read interspersed with the vivid description. For eg
"I felt like lying alone in a vertical chamber dug in the middle of a roaring stadium and was slowly been pulled up just to get slaughtered by bloodthirsty gladiators", is a amazing description, but maybe a lil more words insterspersed with those descriptions.. keep writing, waiting to read more

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@debu
thank you...

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@anu
thats true..me too like small sentences..i will definitely keep that point in my mind when i attempt another one..
thanks a lot..
take care
mip

Echo said...

I love the pools in the grooves

Leo said...

wow...thats deep...!! tht u had a bad dream or somethin!! :)

vinay.

ps: come help me celebrate my 100th post na..!! :) rhymes blog...

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@echo
thank you..

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@vinay..
just watching the rain..
i will come and join the celebration..

Devika said...

Hi MIP,

seemingly it isn't going to 'really' rain anywhere..but some celebrations in the offing -- rain dance??

i wouldn't join, but will love watching..as you, i love the business of watching ;-))

btw, its been long you posted one. you too on a break like me...

come up with a new one, MIP..
the real MIP magic at work!!

wishes,
devika

tunafish said...

drowning in the city of pompei... maybe someone will rediscover you from your watery shrine perfectly preserved one day...

Back after space gazing...

venus66 said...

It's raining back here in Johore, Malaysia almost everyday.
Thank you for your kind visit.
I will come again.
Bye.

MAN IN PAINTING said...

it doesn't matter much..but it is important if only I see rain with fresh eyes again and again..
thank you tuna for coming back..

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@venus
thank you..everyday rain..:)that is something..
wishes..

The Mind Bedouin said...

MIP
loved some of ur imagery... "many nights inside a rainy day", "the pink waste basket surrounded by crumbled peices of paper in the right corner of the room reminding me of lost trajectories and failed ‘baskets’", "saw hundreds of enormous silver legged stilt walkers running across the garden towards me.." ...
keep it up... lookin forward to more creations!! and thanks for viitin my blog too....:). oh... and ya... this is anon..i remain.. i have changed my name...

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@mind...
thanks a lot...you have a very nice blog..
take care
wishes..
mip

mayz said...

this was brillaint...blogrollin ya

brocasarea said...

looks like I AM LEGEND movie:)...nice one!

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@mayz
thank you..

MAN IN PAINTING said...

@Broca's area.
:)
thank you..

Devika said...

:-)))

if you knew mlayalam, i would have told the right word..:-)

why did you hold all these days, MAN?? :)))

how's baby B? and baby sitting going?

wishes!
devika